Watching Showtime

Jenny’s running into some issues with her straight actresses when it comes to the sex aspect of their relationships. Apparently they don’t know how lesbians have sex, and Jenny’s not too upset at letting them in on all the “secrets”! So funny to watch them try to figure out how to do it, and how great that Jenny decides to get all the actresses a Lesbian Sex Coach to teach them how to do it!

Back at Girl Bar, Shane is showing up to prostrate herself at the feet of Dawn and Cindi. And what’s this? Does Dawn call Cindi her girlfriend instead of her lover?!?! Awesome! And then Shane apologizes, tries to make peace with them for disobeying their “rules” and disrespecting them. Turns out the only way to make it up to them is to get Jenny to put She Bar into her film. Sane admits she doesn’t know if she can make it happen, especially when Dawn says she wants it to be called She Bar in the movie, and then insults Kit’s restaurant. When Shane refuses to comply, Dawn goes back to her alpha dog attitude, threatening and telling Shane she’s fucked. Add to the mix Cindi acting all smug when Dawn’s looking but then asking Shane to call her when Dawn walks away, and you’ve got a recipe for disaster. So much for no drama in Shane’s life!

Alice is packing a suitcase?!? Turns out it’s Tasha’s, and the pair are breaking up!! Tasha’s at the door and giving her the key back. Tasha tells Alice that she trusts her, but that they’re just not good for each other. At least Tasha admits she was gay before she met Alice. While they’re talking, we find out that Alice has been asked to audition for a talk show, to be the “out” girl on a group talk show. When Alice tells Tasha she’s not sure if she wants it, Tasha says it’s a dream come true for her. Alice says she doesn’t know what she dreams of and I can’t decide if it’s more to do with trying to hurt Tasha or if she really means it.

Tina’s over at Bette’s a few hours early to pick up Angie. Hours. If that’s not saying you want to hook it up again, I don’t know what is! Bette’s making dinner for Angie, and Tina starts getting turned on a bit by it, I think. She’s really impressed that Bette has taught herself how to cook, something she apparently never did when the two were together. And then Bette offers to cook for Tina, the first great step towards getting back together. And then Tina drops the bomb … she knows Bette doesn’t want to hurt Jodi, but …. and then they’re kissing again, this time more passionately than at the bar. And of course it takes all of three seconds before the two are fucking. And it’s about time!!! bu tit look slike things are different than they used to be, with Tina taking charge and talking dirty to Bette. Good for her!

Jenny’s freaking out on the phone, telling someone that Vancouver is never going to pass for LA. So funny, and such a poke at the show itself, because The L Word shoots in Vancouver! Tina’s assistant (or whomever she is) isn’t taking Jenny’s shit whatsoever, however, and locks herself in the car until William texts Jenny to tell her they’ll be shooting in LA after all, that he’s gotten some more funding in. And that’s when we find out Adele has texted William for Jenny, asking for the funding. Instead o freaking out, Jenny tells Adele she wants to celebrate by taking her shopping. I smell a makeover!!

Phyllis is back in the picture!! It’s about damn time they bring her and Joyce back! Looks like they’re not getting back together as a couple, but they’re going to re-instate their work relationship, seeing as how she started out as her lawyer before they got together in the first place! Phyllis fights it briefly, but the reality is that Joyce is the best in the business at this sort of thing, and she also thinks Phyllis owes her!

Out shopping, Jenny’s doing what she thinks is a nice thing and “buying” Adele some new clothes. Turns out that she’s really going to take the money for the clothes out of the wardrobe budget for the film. That’s going to come back and bite her in the ass for sure! Wait, Jenny changed her shoes? And then Adele suggests a necklace for Jenny to give to Nikki as a present for the beginning of shooting. Turns out no one but Adele knows about Jenny and Niki except for Adele, which I’m sure she’s going to use to her advantage sooner rather than later. Too bad Adele looks gorgeous now that she’s gotten her makeover … Jenny’s definitely created a monster! At least she agrees that only Shane should be doing her hair! (I love that Jenny not only picks up things for Adele, she gets herself some shoes and a hat (and possibly the coat, too).

Poor Alice is curled up in bed with a broken heart. She’s got pillows piled up where Tasha used to be, and is crying her eyes out. Tina’s got Angie for the day or two, and she calls Bette to see if she wants to eat with them. Jodi’s over, however, so she opts out. Turns out Bette and Jodi really aren’t getting along very well, as Bette wants to stay at home while Jodi just wants to head out and go go go. Jodi just won’t let up, and I stand by the fact that she’s more controlling than Bette ever was with Tina.

Over at the Planet, Shane and Alice are meeting up with Alice instead of Bette, and the three are talking about everything from heading over to Phyllis’ to Alice and Tasha breaking up. And that’s when Bette calls to see if they can hang out, but they don’t get a chance to finish their conversation because Angie sees rats running around. I’m betting it’s Dawn and Cindi, and Shane thinks the same. Next thing we see? Kit at the gun range practicing shooting her pistol!! Someone’s gonna go all Foxy Brown on them!

At Phyllis’ part that night, everyone’s having a good time drinking and dancing. Bette and Tina run into each other, and there’s so much obvious chemistry still between them it’s ridiculous! How their friends haven’t noticed yet is beyond me. Bette asks if Tina wants to leave, and of course she nods yes. This leaves Shane and Alice alone th all the middle-aged dykes, and they’re pretty giggly about all that’s going on. Looks like all the lesbians have on their black bras, and are slowly stripping down to them, when Shane notices the only other younger girl there. Turns out it’s Phyllis’ daughter!

Back at Tina’s house, she and Bette drinking tea and talking about how Lez Girls is finally becoming a reality, with Jenny at the helm. And then Bette’s honest, telling Tina she doesn’t know what to do, that she might not be in love with Jodi like she originally told her, and that it doesn’t compare to their relationship. (ps ~ i love Tina’s papartment). And then they’re fucking again, this time at Tina’s house and for a longer time (at least, we get to watch for longer). Looks like the pair might just get back together after all! My favorite part? When Bette mouthes “I love you” with her back to Tina. And then they have to talk about it, decide what’s right for them both individually and as a couple, and then go from there. Why can’t they just be back together?!?

It’s the first day of shooting Lez Girls, and they’re in California like Jenny wanted. As they’re walking through the set, Adele tells Jenny where everything is from craft services to where to find the cameras and such.

Phyllis has called Bette and Jodi into her office, but not to talk about the impending problem with Jodi’s student. Instead, she wants the pair to talk to her daughter, to convince her that lesbians aren’t debauched! And then she brings up the student issue, but they don’t solve anything. Just then, Molly shows up to visit her mom, and Phyllis introduces everyone. And just then Jodi says that she’s resigning, that she knew the piece was going to happen and didn’t tell Bette because she knew she’d never allow it. She says that she’ll be fine because, despite how much she loves teaching at the college, she’s got her own artwork she can do, and most importantly she’s got Bette. Dagger through the heart! Now Bette’s going to puss out on breaking up with Jodi!

Back at the set of Lez Girls, they’re already an hour and a half behind schedule, and it’s only the first day! And before they’ve even started shooting Niki’s coping attitude with Jenny, telling her that her idea is dumb and that she doesn’t want to do a minor part of the whole thing. And not even halfway through the first scene, Niki’s telling Jenny her lines suck, that she thinks it’s stupid that Jesse would be confused at how Bev and Nina could be having a baby. Poor Jenny, Niki’s just insulted her life! After Niki busts off set upset that Jenny’s not treating her specially, Jenny tells her that she’s trying to keep it a low profile because she doesn’t want people gossiping about them. Looks like Jenny’s met her drama queen match when it comes to pouting! After she kisses her and they make up, they start fucking in Niki’s trailer. Too bad Niki’s mike is still on and everyone can hear what they’re doing!!

And that’s when William shows up. Adele, ever to the rescue, heads off to grab him before anyone else can get to him and let him know on the truth of the situation. When William gets upset that Jenny and Niki are sleeping together, Adele says that it’s a good thing, that she started sleeping with Niki to get her onto the picture. And that’s when the rest of them come up to tell William that Jenny should be fired, but Adele has already warped William and so he sides with Jenny and pretty much tells the rest of them to kiss off.

Alice is trying to film another episode of Alice In Lesbo Land, on the set of Lez Girls, but she’s all teary eyed still from her breakup with Tasha. This is going to be the hardest shoot ever!

To make matters worse on set (as if Jenny schtupping Niki wasn’t bad enough), there’s a problem with the neighbors who say they don’t want their neighborhood to be portrayed as a “hotbed of lesbian action”. Guess who it is starting all the drama … Dawn Denbo!!! It’s great, though, that the women she brought with her to try to stop production, are willing to settle for the money William offers them, and production goes on as scheduled.

Shane’s in the makeup and hair trailer doing Adele’s hair, and she’s definitely hitting on her, complimenting the makeover she got in Vancouver. She’s finally getting her hair done, an she wants her hair really long and straight with bangs. Sounds a lot like Jenny’s haircut! And rather than noticing that she’s being a crazy stalker, Shane just wants to make sure that she knew that’s what she was asking for. And so Adele acts all surprised, like he wasn’t at all thinking about Jenny’s hair cut, and Shane falls for it. CRAZY!!

To make the set complete, Kit and Bette show up to see how things are going. And Bette and Tina are acting all cutie again, and again no one picks up on it. They’ve shown up just in time for the “martini”, which is the last shot of the day. While they’re talking, Max walks up and says she likes Adele’s new haircut, and Adele says that Shane suggested it. Someone’s a lying piece! While that’s going on, Alice, Shane and Kit are talking about taking down She Bar for all the crap Dawn Denbo is causing. And that’s when Max walks up to hear Shane say that Adele insisted on the hair cut. And that’s when they start to figure out that she’s a bit crazy.

And of course we have to end with Bette and Tina flirting and Adele following Jenny around like a puppy dog. Here’s hoping Adele finally gets called out for her craziness, but I’m betting that’s not going to happen until the very end of it all.

season five links:

LGB Tease
Look Out, Here They Come
Lady Of The Lake
Let’s Get This Party Started
Lookin’ At You Kid