Watching Showtime

Hah! I love that the rough cut of Lez Girls is the exact same script, almost word for word, as the first and second seasons. Until Bev and Nina make up, work things out. Hilarious! It’s like the alternate universe of the women we’ve grown to love all these years. At least crazy Jenny was on a small leash, acting all sane as she started to give notes to the woman editing the scene together. Looks like Adele has finally out-crazied Jenny!

Sitting around the Planet, the ladies are all talking about the Bette/Jodi situation. It looks like everyone’s being snippy with one another, and yet no one points out that it’s once again Max who has his finger on the pulse. He knew Adele was a basket case from moment one, and now he’s the one who knows where Jodi is staying. Which is weird that she’s not staying in her loft since she and Bette didn’t move in together to my knowledge. Hmmm. Snippiest at one another are Tasha and Alice, who blame each other for everything and blame all the attitude on the PMS.

And just then Dawn Denbo and her lover Cindi show up to bust up the party. Turns out they took a meeting with Ivan, who unloaded her half of The Planet. More than half, actually. Which means they now own more of it than Kit does. Cindi doesn’t look as happy about it as Dawn does, who leaves saying she’s going to bring in a decorator to make the place over. And just as the ladies are trying to clean up the mess Dawn and Cindi left behind (in the form of Kit’s overturned table), Jodi walks in. Drama isn’t spared this week!! When Tina tries to apologize right off, Jodi cops attitude, which is to be expected. And then Jodi orders Bette out of The Planet so they can spend some time together. And so they head off in their pseudo-matchy outfits to talk. Bette reschedules a few things with her assistant James, using PMS once again as an excuse (running theme this episode?), and then tells Jodi that their conversation is the most important thing in the world to her.

Back at The Planet, Max and Shane are grilling Tina on things between her and Bette, when Bette gets a message that Jenny missed a meeting with the Art Department, and Adele went in her place. And once again Max points out the crazy in Adele. But this time people are starting to listen. Except, of course, for Tina, who’s just worried about fixing the issue. Back to the conversation between Bete and Jodi, Bette is crying in her house, trying to keep Jodi from seeing, but it doesn’t work. Jodi rightfully tells her she doesn’t get to be the one who is sad or sorry, not when she feels chewed up and spit out. And when Jodi starts to scream questions at Bette, she says it’s not about fucking (which it isn’t). And then Bette gives a very adult explanation for what happened. She says they never finished, they never realized how strong the connection was, and how much there was that still needs to be resolved. And then Jodi asks the right question. Is Bette in love with Tina. And Bette, bless her, says she is. I love that finally, after five years, she’s starting to grow up a little bit, at least emotionally. And then Jodi lays out the bomb. She says she knows she loves Bette to the exclusion of everyone else, and so she will fight for her. Things just got interesting!

Alice and Tasha are house hunting … why they don’t move into her apartment is beyond me, but there they are, looking at renting a house. The rent is a lot more than Tasha feels comfortable with, however, and when Alice says they don’t have to spit it “exactly down the middle” Tasha makes it clear that they absolutely have to split things down the middle. And then they use the PMS excuse yet one more time.

Back at Bette’s house, Jodi’s finally getting to be the one to cry, letting Bette in on how much pain she’s in. Before Bette, she never wanted to feel love like she feels, and now Bette has officially broken her heart. But then Jodi tries to kiss Bette, and although at first she protests slightly, it doesn’t take long before they’re in full-on makeout mode. Tina’s at work trying to send Bette a text message when Sam walks in flirty flirty like nothing’s changed between them. Then the pair start talking about the movie, and it turns out Jenny’s actually got some directorial talent. Just as they’re about to start flirting all heavy, Tina’s called into the conference room. Jenny, Adele, and several of the studio execs are there, and apparently Adele’s in charge of the meeting. She pops in a dvd without saying a word, and it’s the sex tape!!! It turns out Adele has made 25 copies of the tape, each one logged and addressed to all the biggest gossip sites and magazines in the world. Bribery is a bitch! It turns out Adele doesn’t want much, really. She just wants to cut down Jenny completely in front of everyone. Turns out that’s not the only thing she wants. But we don’t get to find out yet.

Back at Bette’s, the pair are getting hot and heavy, but when the phone rings it seems to snap Bette out of the spell. She pushes Jodi off, telling her she doesn’t want to be doing that. Jodi stomps up, threatens to kill herself, and tries to leave. When Bette goes after her, Jodi says she wouldn’t ever really kill herself, and then Bette gets sucked in even more, saying that she’s going to fight for their relationship. So Jodi offers to go with Bette to school so they can talk when she’s done with her meetings, which Bette agrees to.

Back on set, the whole cast and crew are waiting for Jenny to get there. She storms in and grabs Niki saying she needs to talk to Niki. Jenny tells Niki about how they got ahold of the tape, and then the rest of the people come busting in trying to get Niki away from Jenny. She’s trying to get everyone to come with her, to leave the set, but doesn’t tell anyone why, and even Niki doesn’t seem to be with Jenny. Shane’s the only one who says she is. Just as the security team shows up to take Jenny away, Tina asks if she can walk Jenny out, saying that she’s on her side. And Jenny goes back to begging Niki, who won’t leave with her. After Jenny heads off set, Adele struts in ready to direct the movie for Jenny. Turns out that was her thing the whole time. She wanted to direct the movie, and now she gets to. CRAZY!!!

Alice and Tasha are still looking for places to live and still having arguments about it. Tasha says their relationship will be out of balance if they don’t split things evenly, and Alice says she will be out of balance if she has to live in a shit-hole. That upsets Tasha, who says the place they’re looking at is better than anywhere she’s ever lived. Alice cuts the discussion short, however, saying she needs to get ready for the taping of her next guest appearance on tv, and that they should go to dinner later to discuss it further. Things aren’t looking good for the pair right now, though, as Tasha isn’t going with Alice to her taping, instead heading back to Long Beach to hang out with some friends.

Back on set Tina’s trying to calm Jenny down, telling her not to do anything rash and not to retaliate. Tina tells her to call her agents to let them know what’s happened, to get their advice, and that she should call Niki later in the day. Jenny, however, says that Niki is dead to her, which is a far cry from the promises they were making to each other on the Pink Ride. And we finally get to see Tina and Jenny back to being friends, with the movie finally drawing them together. On set Adele is trying to direct the movie but is having some trouble with Niki. She has to give them moment by moment directions so they can get through the scene, and while Im sure it goes okay it’s totally creepy! And you can clearly tell Adele’s larger goal, which is to get with Niki. In between filming scenes, Tina calls Bette to talk to her about everything that’s going on, but her cell is off.

Filming the fake View, Alice gets a great applause and seems to be fitting in quite nicely, trading barbs with the super conservative host and even saying she might be gay. While that drama is happening, Kit’s in the office at The Planet, where she’s been ostensibly since she stormed away from Dawn Denbo and her lover Cindi. She’s cracking into the safe to get her gun, and she’s loaded it up with bullets and then getting into her car!!! Aw Kit, don’t go kill anyone yet!

The androgyny fashion show on the Fake View is absolutely ridiculous, with the outfits not looking very androgynous at all. But then Clea Mason, the designer, walks out and she’s super cute and almost scared to be on the show. She’s not very good on camera, freaking out the entire time, and pretty clearly a lesbian. You can read the flirtation happening between her and Alice from across the room! After the show they flirt some more, and just then Tasha’s standing off to the side watching. That’s not going to go well! Or, maybe it is. Tasha doesn’t seem to care at all.

Stuck in traffic, Bette and Jodi aren’t talking and Bette’s once again missing a phone call. This time it’s from Kit, who’s in front of She Bar and trying to get someone to talk her down from doing something horrible! Finally at school, James tells Bette she and Jodi have been selected by W Magazine to be the representative of a power lesbian art couple, but that it’s all happening too fast and they need an answer fast. Jodi says yes, but Bette says no, and dismisses James so that she can head into class, leaving Jodi standing in the hallway frustrated. After her class/meeting, Jodi and Bette get back to talking, and Jodi’s even more confused. Turns out Bette just meant she wanted to fight for their friendship, not their love life. Jodi says Bette owes it to her to fight for their love life as well, that they should go to therapy together. And once again Bette is forced to be honest (albeit a bit too late) about how she feels and why she no longer wants to be in a relationship with Jodi. And then James comes in to say that Angie’s nanny is sick and can’t pick her up from her play date. That’s when Bette calls Tina, who is in the middle of diffusing more issues on set.

This time it’s the actresses, worried about the directorial change, and scared Adele is going to fire Niki. Tina can’t pick up Angie either, so I’m betting Auntie Kit will be the next to get a phone call. Too bad she’s in the middle of sneaking into She Bar through the back entrance! And just as Kit’s about to pull out her gun Bette calls. So Kit agrees to pick up Angie, and starts to leave, but not before Cindi sees her lurking there. Good thing for Kit Cindi doesn’t seem to like Dawn any more than Kit does right now, because she doesn’t say a word.

Jenny and Shane are smoking weed out of a 2-liter bottle so that Jenny can mourn the loss of her movie and her girlfriend and her assistant. And then Jenny starts comparing Niki to a wicked witch, only then you realize she’s talking about Adele. And then Shane says that she admires Jenny, that she’s a real survivor! Which in reality, she is. She’s built a life for herself despite coming out and then being locked up and everything else she’s been through. Such a great best friends moment for sure! Both of them end up tearing up and sharing feelings, etc etc. And then I puked a little.

By the end of the day Bette and Jodi have finally worked through the breakup. Jodi’s packed up all the things she’d left at Bette’s house, gave her the present that was to be for her birthday, and then she left. Looks like these two aren’t going to be speaking anytime soon. After Jodi walks out the door, Bette opens the silver and black box to find Jodi had gifted her with a watch. With diamonds in it.

Max finally shows up at the house and Shane and Jenny tell him that he’s an oracle and that they need to listen to him more often. NO SHIT!!! As the three of them sit down to smoke some more weed, Kit’s making Angie some dinner at The Planet. As she brings it back to the office, we catch a glimpse of Angie playing with Auntie Kit’s gun. Thank God they didn’t do what I thought they were going to do! Kit gets the gun away from Angie before she shoots it, and then holds her while she cries. Maybe now Kit will get rid of that damn thing! Turns out she does, but she tosses it into the dumpster, which I’m sure will come back to bite her in the ass in the next episode for sure! Families all back together all over the place as Bette and Tina show up to The Planet at the same time to pick up Angie.

With just one episode left, it looks like the fifth season will go out with a bang. Alice kisses the designer, Helena’s back, Jodi’s new art installation gets called a betrayal, and it’s all wrapped around the big party thrown for the wrap of Lez Girls! I can’t wait!!

season five links:

LGB Tease
Look Out, Here They Come
Lady Of The Lake
Let’s Get This Party Started
Lookin’ At You Kid
Lights, Camera, Action
Lesbians Gone Wild
Lay Down The Law
Liquid Heat
Life Cycle